Thursday, April 19, 2012

Good Choices

There are so many options for how to teach one's three-year-old to do the right thing. My preferred method of communication generally follows this form:

"You may do X on your own, or I will do it for you, in 5 . . . 4 . . . 3 . . . ." Usually by the time I get to 3, my daughter is doing what I've asked. One of the greatest punishments I can mete out is to do something for her. I might be able to claim that independent streak, for good or ill.

Sara tends to go a different route. Sara will use rewards and punishments, with the added encouragement for Gwendolyn to "make good choices." Bad choices mean time out, or worse, while good choices mean rewards.

It turns out that what's good for the gosling is also good for the gander.

Yesterday Gwendolyn told me, "I want some juice."

"How do you ask for that?"

"Please."

"Whole sentence."

"Daddy, may I please have some juice."

"Yes. Thank you for asking. Go sit at the counter and I'll give you some juice." I got her cup, poured juice into it, and set it on the counter in front of her.

Gwendolyn picked up the cup. "Good job, Daddy. You're making good choices."

There it is. I guess I'm doing something right.

~ emrys

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